Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
