you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Randomize