It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Randomize
