Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
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