I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Two words: blizzard sex
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
