do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Randomize
