Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
