How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize