Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Randomize
