Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize