I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize
