he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
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