Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
I looked at my own cervix.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
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