a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize