Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Randomize
