either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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