Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
