He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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