Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
