All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
