If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize
