i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
My life is pants optional.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
