a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
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