I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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