She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
