Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
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