yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
