Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
