it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Say something about gay babies.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Randomize
