the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
