That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Randomize
