How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
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