ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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