I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize