You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
How does one acquire holy water?
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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