Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
