I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Contemplating These 27 Questions Will Make Your Brain Explode
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I miss vodka workout Fridays
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.