when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it