idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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