I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
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