He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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