Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize