We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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