Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Don't make out with my wife yet
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
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