Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
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