I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Randomize