dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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