it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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