hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
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