whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Randomize
