So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
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